I'm 15 years old and I'm from New Zealand. I love all music and singing etc. My friends are a big part in my life and they are all very special to me. I live with my parents and my older sister. I love animals and children, my dream is to become a music teacher for children when I leave school.

When I was younger I felt that no-one liked me. I felt that I had no friends and was picked on all the time. I didn't have many true friends and was what you could call a geek. I figured that people didn't like me because I wasn't what they expected me to be. I started changing myself to be the sort of person it seemed that other people liked. I tried to act cool, swearing and being rude. I tried to get all the cool clothes in order to fit in. But that was all an act. For some un-known reason, I started telling people lies - big lies.

This started when I was about 12. I told a friend of mine that I was bulimic, and told other people too. I figured that people wouldn't care for me unless I had a
problem and needed help. I got very depressed and used to cut myself, partly for attention and partly because I thought I deserved pain because of all the lies I'd told. Half way through this year I realized I could not keep on going like this, and realized I had to change. It was very hard, but lifted a great burden off my chest. I told the people who I'd lied to (the ones I was still in contact with) that I had lied to them. It was a great surprise to one, she didn't know what to think, as for the other one, she thanked me for telling her the truth.

Now, I feel so much better. I have matured a lot and don't get as much depressed. I still have my hard times, but everyone does - and I would be in a lot worse shape right now if I hadn't told the truth, it was eating me away inside out. I feel so much better now, and I am trying not to lie, even about little things, but it is very hard because of the habit that I formed over the years. My friend's are there for me which helps, and I know that when they are not able to be there, God is always there.

Some things in my life are still unresolved, but I'm working on them a lot. I still have problems with lying but it's gradually getting less and less. Part of me is glad that I went through what I did, because I met some really good friends through it. But I also regret it because I must have hurt people too.

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